How To Survive A Bear Attack And Other Reasons I’m Scared Of Dating

The other night I fell down a “bear attack rabbit hole.” (Is it still a rabbit hole if it’s full of bears? Unclear.)

What started out as research for a satire post I wanted to write ended in 2 hours of reading about how to tell if a bear is going to attack you, what kinds of bears are most likely to attack you, and how to survive if a bear does…